Forgetting...

There are a few things that have become repetitive prayers now that I have gained a husband. I know we are technically (is it really technical?) in the "honeymoon" phase of our marriage where things are supposed to be the easiest they'll ever be or something, but I figure if I can make a habit of calling for help on even the smallest of issues, it'll make it a bit easier to call for help when life is much more stressful. One of those prayers is that I wouldn't remember the hurts or bitterness of the past, and so be able to move on from an argument without holding things against Colin. I knew coming into this relationship that that was something I had a lot of trouble with. Things could really add up in my soul and the hurt could be sharp for months or years after. I knew that if I wanted our relationship to be healthy and I wanted to be happy, I'd need a lot of help with forgiveness.

Well, I have not been disappointed in this pursuit so far. While it is difficult to choose to forgive in the moment, it has turned out to be one of the most amazing parts of our relationship to me. It's almost miraculous how much I don't remember what we fought about. I try to think back to what I was so mad about in the first place and it's like trying to remember a dream... My brain grasps at little bits of memory until the memory finally flits away into space.
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I know this is something I will have to keep praying for in a regular basis. Life will get more hectic. Our relationship will go through bigger trials. But I hope that that these greater struggles will only create space for greater miracles of forgiveness and 'forgetfulness' to be seen.

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