Tuesday Contemplations

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I feel like I've been living a large part of my life in a state of self-absorption these days.

It's probably not that unusual, but lately I've been uncomfortably aware of it.  I work out to improve myself.  I read to immerse myself in another world.  I eat to please my stomach.  I relax to make myself feel better.  

You're probably like, "yes...so?"

I agree that doing things to improve and sustain ourselves is a large part of the human existence but I know there is much more to it than that, and lately I've been making myself ignorant to it.  

I know that the things I do have to have more of a purpose than what makes me feel/look/act good, at the very least I need to be thinking critically about why I'm doing them.  Often I feel like these are the things I should do in order to be happy, successful, normal even.  But it's a smack in the face when I compare my happiness, success, and normalcy to 99% of the world.  Reading a book for hours may not be an option due to long work hours, or even illiteracy.  Working out for hours sounds kind of wasteful.  Eating extravagantly....ugh.  

I'm not saying this to make anyone guilty.  It's a fine line but I don't believe that guilt is a good start for activism because it is once again self-centered and short-lived. And I do believe it IS important to be healthy, to be wise, to be free from worry.  What I am challenging myself and others to do is to really think critically about where our time and money is being spent, but even beyond that, why we feel we need to do these things.  Is it because by doing these things we become better people?  Because that might be a belief that only realistically applies to 1% of humans on this planet.  
If that's the case...the math clearly says I've got it wrong.

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